Even before we were parents we’ve had experience of poor sleep… thinking too much, worried about something, being disturbed by a snoring partner etc. We often felt tired the next day, and then hopefully caught up on sleep the following night. However if the lack of sleep continues, our tiredness increases, and even when we sleep, it’s not great sleep, and as a result we may be grumpy the next day, or unable to focus on our work.
Once we become parents, sleep often becomes our most desired thing. Nights feeding a newborn, or toddlers with poor sleep habits often leads to huge stress on the parent, and the toddlers!
If you have a newborn who needs those night time feeds (as they do), then it’s important to schedule in some sleep for you the next day when bubs is having a sleep – even a 20 minute cat nap can work miracles!
With a toddler it is vital that you help them learn good sleep patterns, otherwise Read more
I’m Blowing Bubbles!
/by Sonja PrestonDo you ever have those days? The ones where everything seems to go wrong, or it feels like a major challenge? The days that could start well and then an incident happens, or perhaps it’s a bad day from the moment you step out of bed?
Well, the solution could be in a little bottle. And, no, it doesn’t involve alcohol! …….
Years ago, I realised just how many parents I saw were stressed with the pressures of parenting – the on-going mountains of dirty clothes to wash, the constant messy lounge room, the asking children 5 times to hang up their wet bath towels or the reminders to feed the dog, or the feeling so tired because the baby woke 3 times last night, or the worries of a sick child. Add to that the compounded work load of shopping with a baby and a cranky toddler, bringing the groceries into the house from the car in the rain, and then attempting to cook dinner whilst bathing the children and helping the older one with her homework. It’s no wonder we sometimes feel like we are going loopy, or that we’d like to run away from home! Read more
How Would You Go with the Marshmellow Test?
/by Sonja PrestonIn the 1960’s an experiment was conducted regarding impulse control ie the ability to wait, even when you didn’t want to.
It was conducted by psychologist Walter Mischel, and involved sitting a 4 year old at a table in a room. On the table was a plate with one marshmellow on it. The Researcher told the child that she had to leave the room, and that the child could eat the marshmellow whenever they wanted, but if they waited till she (the Researcher) returned then they could have two marshmellows. For most children, marshmellow are a very appealing treat. The Researcher then left the room for 15 mins – an incredibly long time for a 4 year old to wait! The children’s responses to the ‘task’ were videoed.
If you watch the video on Youtube, you will see are the many ways the children try to not eat the marshmellow now, as they really want the second one. Read more
Effective Time Management for Home and Work
/by Sonja PrestonLast week I wrote about how we cater for the needs of our families in terms of how much time we spend with our children, our partner and with ourselves. It can sometimes be a challenge, yet they are all important people to spend time with.
This week I’ll focus on how to spend our time well when we have work outside the house, as well as our work at home.
One important factor to think about is, that every single person on the earth has the same amount of time – we all have 24 hours in a day. It’s how we choose to spend them which makes the difference.
You probably know some people who seem to breeze through the day, managing both to work outside the home, and within the home – children, housework and cooking. And then we see other people who just look tired, stressed and always seem to be in a ‘rush’. You may recognise yourself in one of these scenarios! Read more
Moments of Defence Kids
/by Sonja PrestonI am a mum to three kids and I am a Defence force wife. These two things can make for a very busy and chaotic life but it can be an amazing time. Don’t get me wrong I have mounds of washing waiting for me and dishes in the sink and moments when I want to lock myself in my room and not come out, but making special memories when one parent is away for extended periods of time can happen, it’s about balance. The time away and coping with kids is a whole topic in itself, but creating special family moments doesn’t take much, involving the kids is key. For example the homecoming after an extended period away – and in this case I mean months – is something to be cherished. Yes my kids have made those big, somewhat tacky, signs with pens and paint and streamers and balloons – this exercise in itself was a great time to interact with the kids and most importantly sounds out what they were looking forward too, when their Dad gets home. Read more
How to Find Inner Peace, and Eat it Too.
/by Sonja PrestonWe’re all busy, I hear it every day and see it as people rush to and fro, mobile phones in hands so as to not miss anything. We hold dear our need to immediately respond to the constant flow of social media commentary, text messages, appointments and deadlines – I’m as guilty as most there!
And don’t get me wrong, it is important to do your part, reply to messages, schedule the car service, grocery shop; we each have our individual roles and responsibilities, but being constantly engaged and ready to pounce is having a major impact on our health & wellbeing – we’re becoming more stressed with an alarming and costly 3 days on average, a year lost to stress and mental health concerns.
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You Do What You Gotta Do
/by Sonja Preston‘You’re a booonk head iPad! You’re not my best friend ANY more’.
Possible response: ‘That’s not very nice calling me that, and I like being your friend’.
Actual response: ‘Good’.
The response generally depends on the time of day, day of the week time of the month, number of coffees consumed, the weather, time of wake up that morning and especially what it is in reference to. Example: I’m a ‘booonk head iPad’ because I have carelessly put the grapes into a blue bowl instead of a green one, and they are purple grapes not green ones. You can hazard a guess at the response (with a possible expletive muttered under the breath).
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The Importance of a Good Night’s Sleep
/by Sonja PrestonEven before we were parents we’ve had experience of poor sleep… thinking too much, worried about something, being disturbed by a snoring partner etc. We often felt tired the next day, and then hopefully caught up on sleep the following night. However if the lack of sleep continues, our tiredness increases, and even when we sleep, it’s not great sleep, and as a result we may be grumpy the next day, or unable to focus on our work.
Once we become parents, sleep often becomes our most desired thing. Nights feeding a newborn, or toddlers with poor sleep habits often leads to huge stress on the parent, and the toddlers!
If you have a newborn who needs those night time feeds (as they do), then it’s important to schedule in some sleep for you the next day when bubs is having a sleep – even a 20 minute cat nap can work miracles!
With a toddler it is vital that you help them learn good sleep patterns, otherwise Read more
“I’m Bored” … Why it’s important for children to experience boredom.
/by Sonja PrestonIn my local paper recently there was an article about children being bored in the school holidays, and it listed all the things parents could do for their children to alleviate their boredom… adventure parks, movies, sport based holiday programs, shows, art classes, and places like zoos and museums. Whilst all those places do indeed provide much fun and learning, I’m concerned about the notion that parents must be the ones to solve their children’s boredom, and that entertainment is the key.
If I have a problem, it’s up to me to solve it.
Isn’t that what we want to teach our children?
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Ready for Kinder?
/by Sonja PrestonIs you child starting Kinder (Tasmania) or Pre-school (NSW) in 2016? Are they ready? Are you ready?
There are many things you can do to help your child have a smooth transition into this new experience, both practically and socially.
In a practical way, is your child able to take themselves to the toilet unassisted – to wipe themselves, wash their hands etc. If not, starting showing them and encouraging them to take a more active role.
Can they open or unwrap the food you will be providing? Have a practice with undoing a foil wrapped biscuit or a glad-wrapped sandwich, as well as opening the lunch box or unzipping it themselves. While teachers and aides are very willing to assist the children, it may take a while if there are 10 -20 children requiring help! There’s also a real ego boost for your child when he/she manages to do these things themselves – a real sense of achievement!
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The Things Some Parents Say…
/by Sonja PrestonIn my work as a Parenting Consultant I work with parents who approach me for different reasons. I have parents who want reassurance that their child is developing as they ‘should’ ie that they are meeting the milestones for development in the areas of Language, Intellectual skills, Motor skills – both gross and fine motor, and Social-Emotional skills. Some parents contact me when they think there may be a possible delay in one of these areas – that their child isn’t talking as much as his peers, or not moving as well. Other parents contact me when Mum is returning to work and they want to check on how to best ensure that the child will cope with this new change of routine and people in childcare. And other parents contact me when there is an issue with their child eg around bedtime routines, or when they are approaching toilet-learning, or when they are behavioural issues.
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