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Looking after Mum: Me Time

Looking after Mum: “Me-Time”

Many Mums are awesome at looking after their children – nurturing, feeding, loving, playing, educating, disciplining and laughing.

Many of those Mums are also great at looking after their partners – again, loving, caring & laughing.

Why then, when we are the ‘experts’ at looking after others, do we often do such a poor job of looking after ourselves?

This is a concern, on a few levels.

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Image by Pawel Loj via Flickr

Are you a DO or a DON’T parent?

Don’t touch that!

Don’t spill your drink.

Don’t take off your hat.

Don’t throw the ball in the house.

Don’t forget to put your school bag away.

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Love – how to show it, and how to teach it to your children.

This week includes Valentines’ Day – a day where couples traditionally express their affection for one another – often in the form of flowers, gifts or evenings out. All to show their love for one another. Cynics will says it’s a big marketing ploy! Either way, it’s all focused on LOVE.

 

‘Love’ is a word we use in so many ways….  We say we ‘love’ our morning coffee, and we ‘love’ when we get a bargain at the shops, or that we ‘love’ a roast dinner at Mum’s on Sundays. We also use the word love to express affection eg ‘I love you’ or ‘I love it when you hug me’.

 

We know that love is really about strong affection and caring for someone else whether it is a partner, children, parents, siblings or great friends. We also know that love can be shown in different ways – through touch, words, gifts, and spending time with someone. Through these gestures we show the other person that we care for them and hopefully they feel it also.

 

 What do children know about love? Read more

Walking on Spheres

Encouraging Resilience in Children

There are many definitions of the word resilience. They revolve around the ability of a person to ‘bounce back’ after difficulties, to overcome challenges and to reframe challenges as problems with a solution.

 

Clearly this is an important skill for us to have as adults, as we know life can be full of the unexpected! The experiences we have and we observe during our childhood lead to intrepretations about coping, which we carry forward into our adult years. They can be messages equating to: ‘It’s too hard’, ‘I can do this’, ‘I can’t do this’, ‘It will be okay’ or ‘I’ll get it right this time.’ We all have some of these messages in our heads, and when adversity or a challenge strikes, we act according to the belief systems we have developed about ourselves and life.

A child who frequently hears: ‘be careful’ or ‘let Mummy do that’ will learn that life is risky or unsafe, and that they shouldn’t try. These aren’t messages which will be very helpful as an adult.

We want children to develop a spirit or willingness to give things a go, and to know that even if something doesn’t work the first or the second time, that there will be some solution to a problem, with a attitude of determination.

 

Resilient people are:

  • Optimistic
  • Problem solvers
  • Independent and
  • People Smart

 

How do we build these skills in children?

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